Well, I started another post just a bit ago, but I decided I had something else on my mind I want to share. I want to talk about me.
Okay, no I am not here to brag and talk about myself in that aspect, but I am here to say where I am. Where I am with my relationship with the Lord. With others.
I have been learning a lot over this past year. A lot about focusing on the Lord, applying what I learn, and investing in people. And now that I will be graduating in less than 2 weeks, I want to reflect on all that fun stuff.
First, I have learned a ton about myself. I learned what I am really like. It is so easy to hide yourself in a mask to try to please other people or look like a good person. But the truth is, it is NO fun to try to please others. I am always left unsatisfied and wishing I wouldn’t have focused on what other people want. The difference when we focus on pleasing the Lord is peace and joy. We can find satisfaction knowing that we are striving to please God and love Him with our attitudes and actions. Its easy to be focused on doing the right things rather than allowing the Lord to change our hearts. But I have done a lot of that in the past.. I focused on behavior modification rather than a true heart change. So that is what I am working on now. Being a genuine follower of Christ overflowing from my heart. Another thing I have learned about myself is that I am sick of caring what other people think of me. It doesn’t bother me like it used to if someone doesn’t like me, and I don’t feel the need to hide my personality because someone else might not like me. I feel free to be who I am without worrying about the thoughts of others. Granted, I still struggle in these things, but God is continually working on my heart in those two areas.
Second, I have learned about other people in relation to myself. I have prayed for others, cried over them, and spent a lot of time in conversation with people. I am so thankful for the friends God has provided me with who are willing to encourage me and love me even when I don’t deserve it. They have helped me to branch out and take the focus off of how I appear to others. I desire to grow in Christ-centered relationships with people.. its so exciting! And since we are talking about relationships, I have also learned a lot about future dating and marriage relationships. Not that I am involved in anything of that sort right now, but I know that God is preparing me for the day that might happen. I have learned that I am content to be single for the Lord right now. I am thankful for this time in my life where I can serve the Lord without a lot of other commitments, and serve my family and friends. It is a wonderful time for me to be focused solely on Christ and growing in His grace. I look forward to the day when the Lord may bring me a man, but I pray that the Lord would make me the woman He wants me to be and the man my husband should be.
to sum up, I am excited, thankful, anxious, content, blessed, and a little stressed for this next year. But looking back on this year, its cool to see how God worked, and I can’t wait to see what He’ll do in the upcoming year. 🙂
To all my already dedicated fans, I love you.